The oxymoron that is "being normal." Inherently it assumes what you'd do by reflex may not fit the mold.
I'm trying to act as a friend when there's something more on my mind.
I'm trying to act as an assistant when I know I'm just glorified by title not by compensation
I'm trying to act as a Christian when I feel this chasm between how I want to be and how I am.
Excerpts from Victory Over the Darkness by Neil T. Anderson:
"No person can consistently live in a manner that is inconsistent with how he perceives himself." (pp. 50)
"A productive Christian behavior system is the byproduct of a solid Christian belief system, not the other way around." (pp. 53)
